First Pressie.... hee... Title:
Its Not OverBand:
Veronica, Veronica/LoganFile Size/Program:
19MB/Made with Sony Vegas 6 and WMMSummary Notes:
Its not over between these two. Not at all.Spoilers:
Up to 309Links: You Tube Link FileFront Link
Pressie Number 2Title:
Lost In The SoundsAuthor:
Melissa aka misa_05Characters:
Veronica POV, Logan/Veronica.Word Count:
NC-17. For language and smut.Summary:
She wonders why he stays with her? She already knows why she stays with him.Spoilers:
Up to 303Author’s Notes:
This is my vm_santa
fic for the lovely xcalmsurrenderx
, who wanted either Logan and Veronica thoughts on the ep. 303 with some smut added in. Well here ya go. Enjoy! Beta'd by afrocurl
I own literally nothing.
You’d like to think that you aren’t a jealous person, but let’s face it – you are. But, it comes as a shock to you when you least expect it and you never thought that you would be jealous of another girl with Logan.
Or well, more like two girls inviting Logan to a party and them calling you a friend of his which honestly, makes you want to gorge their eyes out while shouting that you are his girlfriend
and have been for quite some time.
He wraps his arms around you from behind, placing kisses on your neck as he tries to play it off that they are friends and you know he wouldn’t cheat on you – or at least you hope so – but it still hurts when he automatically tells the girls that he’ll definitely be there with them at some stupid party instead of being with you. It seems as if whenever you want to do something with him something comes up and he has to cancel. They do everything he likes, but when it comes to an activity of your choice he chickens out.
You try not to let it bum you and you can see that he is trying to make you feel better. He tells he has class tonight and that he can’t make the art show, but he would be definitely up for something afterwards. You and he can make your own art you think before you smile softly and make a snappy comeback while his hands stroke your face. You wish it could be that simple.
You quickly kiss him goodbye mumbling something about running errands, but let’s face it. You aren’t running errands – you’re running from him.
It surprises you when you see Dick when he supposed to be in class. A class that he has with Logan.
It surprises you even more when he tells you that the class was a walk and that the entire class bailed.
You can feel the anger welling up in side of you.
But the anger isn’t what kills you. It’s the fact that Logan once again ditched and he didn’t even have the decency to call before he decided that he was going to go do something else. Or at least you hope its something else and not someone else.
The next day is a jumble of emotions; anger for the fact that Logan didn’t even call you or show up for the booty call, sadness because you don’t want to believe what Dick told the night before and finally anxiety—you are terrified that you are really loosing him. It’s like he is slowly slipping away from you and you can’t even hold on to him long enough to try to fix whatever is going on.
You decide that no matter what that you will get to the bottom of this. You will. You are about to get your phone out and call him when you suddenly hear a honk and turn to see the person of your thoughts.
You talk, you give him a kiss - act like everything is okay - then slowly you approach the subject that you had wanted to call him for.
He tells you everything that you want hear and its comforting, but you still have that niggling little doubt that is telling you he is lying and just trying to cover his own ass. It hurts you more than you can say when you
have to ask him to show you the notes of the night before.
He tries to blow it off, but you can tell it hurts him as well, so you smile and act like everything’s okay. He isn’t doing anything wrong. He’s not. You are just being weird. That’s all. So you make plans for him to come see you later that night while you are working and he smiles and cuddles a little closer to you.
Your dad had told you that you had a thing about reformed bad boys. Maybe Logan isn’t as reformed as you thought he was.
The case for Trish and her boyfriend is keeping you busy, but not as much as you wish. You still think about Logan, but that’s not unusual. He is a permanent fixture in your mind. You can’t help but think about the time when he didn’t preoccupy your thoughts, and the idea of him not being there scares you.
The problem is though, that you don’t know whether to be happy or to be sad when you think about him. There is a storm brewing between the two of you and it’s not a good one.
You look up and check the clock.
You keep your cool. There’s nothing wrong with being a little late. He could have been stuck in traffic, or could have been getting out of class late or something could have been holding him up.
Ten minutes later he still is not there.
You get up to go put some books away upset that he hasn’t shown. When you get back to the light on your phone is blinking letting you know that you have a voice-mail. It’s Logan. He tells you that he’s not going to be able to make it and that he’s sorry. Usually you would just blow it off, but you hear the people in the background. He’s obviously busy with friends and you can hear the girls in the back calling him. What the hell was this?
He is practically ditching you – his girlfriend, who hasn’t spent hardly anytime with lately – to hang with some friends?
You take a deep breath and gather your wits. You don’t want to do it, but you do. You pull out the tracker that you borrow from your father without his knowledge. If Logan doesn’t want to come to you, you’ll go to him.
It first makes you laugh and then you smirk when you see him. He would rather be here – at some little casino room gambling – then be with you. You try not get too upset, but you see the girls flirting around him and he’s laughing and having fun with people who aren’t you and its just gets you riled up more.
He finally turns to you and you see his face. He’s pissed off and you know that shit is about to hit the fan.
He follows you outside and you two just blow up at each other.
You know that what you did wouldn’t make him happy; to hear you tracing his cell is a sign of distrust and he tells you that much. You repond in kind, going as far as to call him stupid – maybe not in those terms exactly, but it kind of made the same point – and when you are done he walks away and never looks back.
And if fucking hurts. It fucking hurts worse than when you lost Lilly. You know you went so far, but you aren’t the only one to blame here. Yes, most of it was your fault. You are jealous; you couldn’t trust him and you let it consume you. You let Dick’s words get to you about him cheating and when you heard the girls’ voices on his message you just wanted… you’re not really sure what you wanted because all you can think about is how you fucked up and how now he’s gone.
You lock yourself in your room that night and put on some silly love song. Your dad checks on you and you discuss Weevil, but your heart isn’t really in it. You are saddened by what you are going to have to do the next day, but it’s something that is just going to have to be done.
When he finally gets up to leave he asks you if you are okay, but you don’t really say anything back. You just cuddle into your pillows that still smell like Logan and think about times when you and he were happy and carefree. You think about the first time you kissed him at the Camelot and the first time you realized how you really felt. You look back on the first time he made love to you and all the promises that whispered into your skin.
He’s kept all of his, but you haven’t kept all of your’s.
It doesn’t really hit you until you are standing there talking to Trish about her boyfriend and the lengths that she was willing to go to for him, that you are a bad girlfriend. So what if he didn’t come and see you like he said he would, so what if he hangs out with his friends. You know who he is and you know how he feels about you and somehow that should be enough for you.
It isn’t though and you think that makes you a really fucked
up girlfriend. And you wonder why he stays with you.
You know why you stay with him.
You try calling his phone, but it just goes to voicemail. You leave a short message saying that you are sorry for jumping to conclusions, for calling him stupid, for… everything. You just want him to call you back so you guys can talk. But he doesn’t answer his phone. He’s probably to busy having fun in Mexico – not thinking about you.
This whole relationship thing isn’t as easy for you as it used to be. You understand that people change and grow up and that the older you get the more difficult relationships are. Your’s and Duncan’s relationship had been easy. And when you say easy you really mean to say safe. This is sad on so many levels, because you can’t understand why you ever let yourself stay with someone that didn’t make you feel whole.
Yes, he made you laugh, and he made you feel safe, but he was never that rock that you needed. He tried to placate you and change you into that girl with the long blonde hair who woke up missing her panties after a black filled night. You tried so hard to be the girl that you thought he needed, but in reality, it wasn’t you he needed or wanted at all.
It was easy to say goodbye to him from a relationship standpoint. You had done if before and you knew you could do it again. Saying goodbye to him as a friend was difficult. He had part of your childhood and innocence that you would never get back and you know that if he leaves with it, it’s gone.
While your relationship with Duncan was safe and easy, yet, frustrating at times, your relationship with Logan is completely different. You know how he feels about you and you know that somehow he will always come back. The relationship is hard, messy and complicated, yet you wouldn’t change it for anything in the world.
You love the way he makes you feel: protected, safe – loved. There are so many things about him that you adore and maybe even lo- but you don’t think about that. Too many bad things happen when you let yourself feel that way with someone. You loved Lilly and she died, you loved you mom and she left you and you loved Duncan and he fled the country.
You didn’t think you could stand loosing Logan too, so you check your phone to make sure you didn’t miss a call while you’ve been working.
It’s not so bad working in the library you decide after the first two days. It’s boring – but it could be worse. At least you aren’t working under Nish. There’s just something cold about her that you really can’t stand and the library is the perfect place to get away from her and everyone else like her at Hearst.
You check your phone again and sigh. You can’t blame him. You turn back to the computer going through your email sorting through all the junk mail. It’s depressing how many emails there are. A few from your dad and a couple from Wallace and that depresses the shit out of you—you aren’t worthy of an email from him, even.
Out of the corner of your eye you see him. He walks over to you carefully. You both retort back and forth with little snarky comments and then you finally tell him what you’ve wanted to say all night. You tell him you aren’t so good at this relationship thing and that trusting doesn’t come that naturally but you are trying to act unnaturally.
He smiles at you and your heart skips a beat like it always does when he does that. You would kill to have Logan Echolls smile at you like that for the rest of your life. You both get sucked into that little world that belongs to only the two of you only then the moment is ruined by some guy coming up and asking your help to find a book.
You hurriedly put up the closed sign and ignore the guy who came up a minute ago. You don’t want to deal with anyone besides Logan right now. You both have put your cards on the table and its time to make up for all the pain that you both have put each other through this past week.
You grab Logan’s hand and murmur something about a dark corridor in the upstairs landing, pulling him into a kiss. You always get lost in his kisses and it’s no different this time. You yearn to be closer to him – be inside of him – in everyway that you can.
You lay your head on his shoulder as he pulls you closer and you lead him up the stairs. You whisper in his ear that you missed him and that you are so sorry for everything and he stands there looking at you and nodding. He finally silences you by kissing you once again. You should be upset by the fact that he wouldn’t let you finish, but then his tongue is in your mouth doing sinful things that make your knees week and makes you cling to him tighter.
He pushes you against the stacks – your body connecting hard with the spines of books that spell out stories of fairytales that come true. You remember you use to believe in them when you were younger, but then you remember that as you grew older you realized that there was no such thing. Sometimes in Logan’s arms you have that feeling you did when you were five and knew life was ahead of you and that everything and everyone would live happily ever after.
Your tongue pushes hard against his tasting everything about it. You’ve kissed Logan thousands of times and each time a new experience. The kiss turns hotter and you pull him closer, his body straining towards yours. You just need to be closer to his heat, his warmth.
You’re not sure how it happens but from one moment to the other your hands are pulling up his shirt and tossing it over his shoulder, not caring where it lands. You run your hands down his chest, tracing the lines of his abs, before running a finger along the seam of his jeans.
You look up at him and you can see his eyes darken in passion. It’s a look that you love to see on his face. You smile at him and he gives you that little smirk that makes you just want to drop to your knees and worship him – not that you’ll ever tell him that, though.
He grinds his lower body into yours, as he takes your hands, holding them high above your head before bending down to capture a golden breast in his mouth, gently dragging his tongue around your pert nipple. A gasp of pleasure escapes your lips. You press him closer to your overheated body. Your legs come up of their own accord to wrap around his body, latching on never wanting to let him go.
Slowly your hips start moving; you’re back arching to press against him harder. Want to feel you inside me.
You whimper. Your head rolling back and forth against the bookshelf.
His hands come up from your hips and slowly trail up your shirt, catching the bottom, bringing it up and over your head as his did. Shivering, you raise your mouth back to his before taking it in a hungry kiss. Breaking away heavily a moment later, you let your legs fall back down to the ground and your fingers trail once again to his jeans, unsnapping the button and unzipping the fly, letting them fall to the floor.
Before you know it your jeans and panties are off and so are his boxers and he’s lifting you up and pushing his way inside of you and it’s so good. You sink your fingers into his hair, your legs tightening around his waist, seating him further inside her. You both start moving together, rushing towards that peak. He’s thrusting inside of you roughly, shoving you against the bookcase, scrapping your back in a delicious pattern of pain. It’s a pain that you’ll welcome, especially if it keeps him inside of you.
You clench you teeth tight trying to stop the words that are falling out of your mouth, harder, faster, don’t stop, ohmygod, yes, yes, YES
. It’s shameful to admit, but it doesn’t take you long to reach your peak. He touches you at the right moment, his hand making its way down your body and his mouth sucking on your neck and you’re gone, clenching around him, squeezing him tight.
He growls out your name before dropping his head on your shoulder and shuddering. Both of you are panting—trying to catch your breath—sucking air into your lungs. Your legs tighten around him, drawing him closer to your body. You love the feeling of him pressed against you as if you and he were one person.
He lifts you up slightly and pulls out of you and you whimper in protest. You can feel his essence dribble out of you onto your as you both put your clothes back on. You love the feeling of his essence staining your clothes and thighs – something about these last few days has made you realize that more.
You lift up and catch his lips in a sweet kiss and he sighs against your mouth. You both pull away with a grin. His arms comes up and around your shoulder, pulling you against his body as his mouth goes to your ear and whispers Lets go back to my place and make up some more
. You giggle and nod as you both descend the stairs.
The library is bare once again and you look up at the clock for the millionth time that night and realize that your shift is over and that it’s time to leave. He grabs your things and you smile at him. He lifts out his hand and it’s very reminiscent of a night of whispered confessions and video cameras and you can only do the same thing you did back then.
You take his hand.
Things aren’t perfect. They probably won’t ever be, but as long as you are both trying than that is all that really matters.